Seven weeks.
Having got on top of some of Darryl’s pain and discomfort issues Darryl had a far more restful day today. It lowers the stress levels significantly! You can almost see the healing going on when Darryl lays there with his new-found snore gently rumbling away.
I did quite a few short sessions of physio and basic activities with Darryl today as there is no physio on the weekends. He performed really well and when I asked him how many leg raises he wanted to do with his left leg he put five fingers up. So five leg raises he did, each time getting his entire leg off the bed. Then I noticed Darryl was lifting his head and shoulders off the bed. I asked him if he was in pain because he looked as if he was cramping in the stomach. When I asked however he said he wasn’t. To my delight I soon discovered that Darryl wasn’t cramping, he was actually trying to sit up.
This was closely followed by him engaging his left arm to press into the mattress as a lever and actually lifting his whole left side off the bed and then able to shimmy his backside sideways. I said, “hold on mate you’ll be climbing out of bed if you keep this up”, to which he threw up a thumb. What it all amounts to is Darryl’s left side is waking up and he is exercising himself in bed.
His nurse for today sat beside his bed at one point today and said to Darryl that he was avery determined young man. I asked Darryl on a scale of one to five, one being not very, five being extremely, how determined was he. I don’t really need to tell you how many fingers shot up into the air…
The other treat for the day was coming into the room to find Darryl had woken up and had his eyes open looking around. For the first time, without any prompting as such he had opened both his eyes. Another milestone in the mountain he’s carrying away. It is now a regular occurance for him to open his eyes (as far as he can anyway) when he is awake and not too fatigued.
The only thing he got badly wrong today was his pick for the All Black test. He picked the ABs to win by 10. I’m not sure what happened to that script. I thought his pick was pretty much on the money. Oh well something for him to work on I suppose.
So seven weeks into this nightmare, Darryl has shown what he is and has always been made of. There are times when I think back to Darryl prior to this tragedy and the life we knew then. It is hard because in so many ways it seems like a world away. In that sense it is disheartening to call on those memories because the reflection comes at the expense of accepting the reality of today. But as these milestones are achieved a new bank of ‘Darryl’ memories begin to develop and the Darryl I knew prior to this event becomes in some ways an enhanced version of the former. They say that traumatic brain injury often changes the personality of a person. It is hard to see how that could be the case with Darryl because the one thing that has remained totally and utterly intact throughout, has been his character, his determination and his courage. This is who Darryl is and in my view is the only reason he still ‘is’ and not was.
Darryl, having fought your way back from that which most would have fallen, it is clear to me each day that what hasn’t broken you is making you. There is not much more I would have thought you needed to ‘make’ before this, but real tragedy and adversity are the seeds from which the most meaningful of growth will sprout. Maybe, just maybe, this experience is part of your coming of age in this regard. The test of you, that only you could withstand, because real growth comes only when you are put to and pass the test. And pass it you will Darryl.
Keep strong and true.
Dad
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