A cut ‘n paste day today. Darryl is still sailing the stormy seas at night and seems to be resting quite well during the day. I am fairly confident the storming relates to discomfort. He is unable to move or communicate pain or discomfort so he starts tensing up and sweating in response. There is not much known about storming, but I certainly notice a pattern with it over recent days.
When he is moved, washed or stretched during storming, more often than not it stops the sweating almost immediately and he relaxes and drifts into heavier sleep. It could just be coincidence, but it’s a fairly frequent occurance if that is the case. Either way it’s pretty distressing for all concerned.
Darryl seemed to feel that the Chiefs will win the Super 14 final, but he had picked both the Canes and the Crusaders to win the semi-finals so don’t go crazy at the TAB based on his picks. Or maybe I was just getting his thumbs up mixed up. I challenged Darryl to wake up by the final which he seemed up for (so to speak).
It must be a terrible state to be in for him. He seems keenly aware of life all around him and tries like crazy to communicate with his thumbs and now his entire arms are moving as well, all while two shades of consciousness away. He seems to be stirring, but the flip side is that he will be getting more and more frustrated while in his more awake states.
I have tried to imagine it (not that I really have to when I am so close to it) and how it would feel to be in a dark room with no idea where the door is and being tethered to the floor at almost every moving body part, somehow trying to fight your way to the door and out of the room, while all you can hear is others calling to you from the other side of the door you can’t see. I don’t like to imagine that comparison too often!
Brenna’s take on reality was highlighted today when as we walked out of the ward in which the HDU is, she looked down the corridor to ward 82, critical care and turned to me all matter of fact and said “That’s the really bad place down there aye Dad?” I enquired as to what she meant by that and she replied “It’s where you go when you are feeling really bad, because that’s where Darryl was when he was really bad, but now he’s feeling a bit better so he’s in the other place which is good”.
I can’t even bear to look at the doors of critical care as it induces an automated panic reponse and yet Brenna has processed the experience and information and is moving on. I hope she is anyway. So refreshing to reflect on the innocence and care-free spirit of childhood. If only you could bottle those childhood coping mechanisms and store them up for adulthood. I’d be downing my fair share now that’s for sure!
Come on Darryl, keep hunting for that door, searching through that fog and following the voices back to us. Just keep going mate.
Mike
I hope you don’t mind me suggesting it, and I don’t know if you’re doing it already or if it’s even appropriate but I wondered if reading to Darryl might help time pass. There’s this book that reminds me of Darryl at the moment, you may have seen the movie or know the book ‘Touching the Void’ by Joe Simpson.
He is a British climber who smashed his leg on a high mountain in South America and went through so much as he fought his way off the mountain … unbelievable things happened. He made it against all the odds and he writes of it so stunningly well. If Darryl is conscious of everything going on … well, I just wondered about this reading thing.
I try to comment every other time I think of it, aware I’m a stranger but anyway, it just an idea. I have a 4 year old kiwi granddaughter living here with us all in Belgium and your Brenna stories do make me smile.
Take care and stay strong.
Kindest regards
Du
Du = Di. I’ve been travelling and I’m a wee bit tired.
Hi Mike
Cut and paste again, well that sounds good to me. Small progressions are the way to go.
Keep on in there as Darryl’s guide out of the confusion of the fog.
Brenna is so right, progression along the corridor from ICU to HDU and ionwards can only be seen as a sign of progress.
Keep well
Kia Kaha
Hi Darryl, Mike Catherine and Brenna,
So pleased to hear of the small progresses that Darryl is making, we are are still thinking of you all. Darryl we went trekking this weekend around Matt Lanagans place, good pig hunting apparently, I was just pleased that my butt wasnt too sore! beautiful scenery we could see for miles. Keep making those improvements and we will see you soon.
Love Rachelle and Dennis and the kids.
Cmon buddy, waiting, waiting!!!!
Sort of feel that you will make an entrance soon aye!!
Love and regards to all, Bill Thurston x x x
Mike – Please tell Darryl that even though we don’t know your family personally (although we feel we know you pretty well now) we are so looking forward to the day when you post the words that Darryl has woken up out of his coma. Thanks for keeping us updated so faithfully every day.
Hi guys
Glad to see those little steps keep moving. Come on Darryl!! We are all cheering for you. Thanks for the daily updates Mike – its great to hear the positives. Tell Brenna that Bella is good and that she snuck inside and slept on the dining room floor yesterday in the afternoon sun! Catherine your pot plants haven’t died yet so I must be doing something right! You are all obviously doing a great job with Darryl and he is so lucky to have such a wonderful Dad Step-mum brother and sister who care for him so much. So come on Darryl we are all waiting for you to come home and enjoy that Doubtless Bay fresh air thats waiting for you.
Love and prayers for you all
Glenys
Hello Darryl,
Do you know the first time i talked to you properly was at the boar hunt at Herekino a year or so ago, and ever since then i have looked forward to seeing you.
But not as much as i look forward to opening this site and reading that you are awake and on the road to recovery.
Come on buddy, we all know you have it in ya!
Thinkin of you heaps,
Holly Urlich
Just checked in on Darryls progress. He has come so far!!! C’mon Darryl, Not far to go now, Keep fighting mate, you are nearly there.
Keith O’Donnell
kia ora to the sabin family.i have been keeping up to date with darryls progress through classic hits(will n jax)i hope that this dosent come across as offensive to the family in any way as i know you are all dealing with matters concerning darryl and his recovery.this is not a hoax e-mail as i take life very seriuosly.i would like to offer your family my services as i am a spiritual healer.i do not charge for my gift as it has been handed down to me by God and it is through God that i do my work,i am able to come to darryl this coming saturday(30/05/09) from whangarei and work on darryl….if you are comfortable with this and need to ask any questions text me 0272299947 and i will ring you back immediately,mike,my son says hi and sends his best wishes to you all,my son met you at one of your drug programmes that you held at pompallier college last year.may the power of the great spirit bless you all,arohanui